


Awkward

by DarkJediQueen



Series: Attraction [3]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Asexual!Spencer, Asexuality, Awkward Sex, Established Relationship, M/M, Panromantic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:08:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25666453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkJediQueen/pseuds/DarkJediQueen
Summary: It's messy. It's awkward. It's sex. It's not supposed to be perfect every time.
Relationships: Aaron Hotchner/Spencer Reid
Series: Attraction [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/341131
Comments: 10
Kudos: 113





	Awkward

**Author's Note:**

> **Year** : Season 7 (2011)  
>  **Spoilers** : Up Through Season 7  
>  **Notes** : Everything I got, I got from [Asexuality Archive](http://www.asexualityarchive.com/) & [Asexuality.org](http://www.asexuality.org/)  
>  **Beta** : rivermoon1970

Spencer walked down the stairs in his pajamas. Aaron was sitting on the couch, his legs up on the coffee table, and a book spread across his lap. Spencer liked the look of him like that. It was domestic in a way that Spencer didn't think that he would ever get from someone. Spencer just stopped on the last step and looked at his partner. The house still smelled like cleaning products after the cleaning job was done before Aaron and Jack had moved into the house. 

The tenant above Aaron had never mentioned they had a water leak to the superintendent. When part of the wall came apart exposing an extensive mold issue, Aaron decided to look for a house and forwent another apartment. It seemed that he had been thinking about it for a while, wanting Jack to have a yard that he didn't have to walk to like the little play park at the apartment complex. Aaron had found a house quickly that he loved and paid a company to clean it from top to bottom before he had moved in. It had been a whole weekend of the team running to and fro while JJ and Spencer directed where everything was to go when it got to the house. Aaron and JJ had grounded Spencer because a cold snap had given Spencer a chest cold. Because of the scarring on his lungs from his exposure to Anthrax, Spencer was having trouble doing anything without coughing. Aaron and JJ had grounded Spencer, and Aaron was thankful that Spencer didn't fight it that much.

Aaron had trusted Spencer to make sure that everything was taken care of during the move. Aaron had paid a specialty moving company to pack up everything while looking for mold damage. The team had been on a case, and Aaron put Jessica in charge of overseeing the move. When they got back, the team helped in transferring all of the boxes to the new house. Every day Aaron went through at least one box figuring out what he wanted to keep and what he wanted to get rid of. The larger stuff had already been set up as well as the bedrooms and the kitchen.

"Hey," Aaron said. His head was now tipped back on the couch, and he was looking at Spencer with a fond look on his face.

"Hey," Spencer said. He stepped off the last step and walked toward where Aaron was on the couch. Aaron moved the book off of his lap and held out his hand to Spencer. Spencer took his hand and allowed his partner to pull him onto his lap. Spencer grabbed Aaron's shoulders to settle himself down without dropping all the way onto his lap.

Aaron worked his hand under Spencer's T-shirt. His fingers splayed over the small of Spencer's back. It was a favorite place for the hand to be when they were like this. Hell, when Spencer was close to Aaron at all. Spencer picked at Aaron's shirt, where a hole was. Aaron had changed into his pajamas after spilling part of dinner on himself. He came back down in a ratty T-shirt and a pair of sleep pants. Jack had changed as soon as he was done eating while Spencer had stayed in his slacks and sweater.

"You're wearing my T-shirt," Aaron said as he grinned at Spencer.

"You said I could wear it whenever I want." Spencer shrugged, and the slightly worn-out collar slipped and showed part of his shoulder instead of just the base of his neck. Aaron used the hand on Spencer's back to pull him closer to where he could press a kiss to the skin there. Spencer and Aaron had showered before leaving work as Spencer had been doing his weekly training with Morgan on takedowns. Aaron had joined them, so showers before leaving had been a must.

"I did. You don't smell like normal."

"No, I buy cheap stuff for my locker at the Academy because I don't use it that often really, and I don't care what I smell like."

Aaron hummed against Spencer's skin, and Spencer felt his lips part before a tongue licked at that spot. Spencer squeezed his hands on Aaron's shoulders. He let go with his left hand and buried that in Aaron's hair before tugging to where they could kiss. Spencer settled down onto Aaron's lap even more so they were closer to the same level. He gripped Aaron's hair just a little tighter to keep him in place as he brushed their lips together. It was nice, the simple closeness that kissing had brought them. Aaron had developed a not so small kink for pressing Spencer down on the couch and making out. Aaron usually got off, but he didn't push Spencer to get off as well unless Spencer was actually rocking against him.

It months of starts and stops for Aaron to get used to listening to Spencer and his cues. They had no real issues anymore. Aaron had the closeness that he craved through sexual contact while Spencer had his touching and kissing. It was a good middle for them.

Aaron took control of the kiss after a few minutes, one arm wrapping fully around Spencer's waist and holding him close. There was a desperation to the kiss, and without saying anything, Spencer knew what exactly Aaron wanted. Spencer was ready for that step. He wanted it for Aaron and just to show himself that he could do it. He was connected with Aaron more than he had been to any of his other partners.

"Aaron," Spencer said when he pulled out of the kiss. Aaron's lips went right for Spencer's neck, kissing spots all over like he needed that connection when he didn't have Spencer's lips. "Aaron."

"Yes," Aaron said.

"Make love to me, Aaron." Spencer forced Aaron's head up to look at him. Aaron looked unsure for about two seconds, but as his eyes moved over Spencer's face, he looked more and more sure of himself. Aaron swallowed and nodded his head.

"You locked up, right?"

"When I came home? Yes. We are all locked up tight." Spencer didn't let his mind linger on the fact that he did think of Aaron's as home. Spencer spent only about three or four nights at his apartment for most weeks. He would come to Aaron's on Friday night and stay through Sunday as well as some Mondays. Aaron had given himself over to the relationship wholly. It was nice, but Spencer wondered if Aaron was trying too hard to show that he could do it more than making Spencer believe it. Aaron loved with all that he was, and Spencer knew that once he was in a relationship, he was in it for the long haul.

That was the reason that Spencer had been open to starting a relationship with the man. Though Spencer had been under the assumption that Aaron knew that he was asexual the whole time he was on the team. Aaron had adapted pretty well after their rough patch, where Aaron had tried to become celibate.

"OH!" Spencer cried out as Aaron moved, his arm around Spencer, keeping him close. As soon as Spencer figured out that Aaron was going to carry him up the stairs, he moved his legs to where he was wrapping them around Aaron's waist as Aaron was standing up. Spencer wrapped his arms around Aaron's neck next, holding on for dear life. Aaron didn't try and kiss him, he just kept their eyes locked as he walked to the stairs. It was a strange procession through the living room and then up the stairs. Spencer was kind of enjoying the feel of how built Aaron was, holding him like he was.

Spencer didn't even realize that they were in the bedroom until the door shutting startled him so much that he almost fell out of Aaron's arms. Aaron moved them faster to the bed and dropped Spencer down onto it before following. Spencer scooted up the bed so that they could both get onto it. Spencer had turned down the bed earlier so that they could slip into it. He had foreseen at least another hour of reading before they stumbled to bed tired. It was only Saturday night, but the workweek had been tiring, and they had just lazed about the house that day.

Aaron kept up the kissing as they worked on stripping each other. It was a good feeling, the slow reveal of skin, skin rubbing on skin. Spencer hadn't ever really enjoyed it before Aaron. Oh, he had liked kissing and rubbing on each other, but getting naked usually meant sex that Spencer didn't care for that much, and it always wilted the erections that he had. So this, the slow build to it with the months' buildup of them just rubbing on each other, had made just this act a little arousing to Spencer.

"Ready?" Aaron asked as he pushed to where he could get the lube and the condom. Spencer had insisted on condoms for the first few times if they ever got to this form of sex. Spencer was usually okay with fluids, but if he freaked out, the quick clean up would help settle Spencer. Aaron agreed as he had never had penetrative sex with anyone except for Haley.

"Yes," Spencer said. He pulled his legs up to where Aaron could get to his ass a little easier.

Spencer shuddered at the first swipe of fingers over his hole. He grabbed Aaron's head and pulled him close to kiss him. He needed this part to not worry too much about doing the right thing or moving the right way. As long as they were kissing, everything was okay. Aaron's free hand pressed Spencer's leg up to where Aaron could lay over him on the bed. Spencer moaned into the kiss, liking being pressed into the bed. That was something that Spencer hadn't enjoyed until he was with Aaron. Spencer chalked that up to the trust that was between them. Spencer had never trusted anyone like he did Aaron, even with the issues surrounding Prentiss's faked death. On a personal level, there was no one else that Spencer thought he would ever trust like he did Aaron.

The first press of a finger inside of him shocked Spencer mainly because he had been too lost in the feel of Aaron over top of him, Aaron's lips on his. This was wonderful. Aaron was keeping his body active, and he barely thought about what was coming next. Even when Aaron graduated to the second and third fingers, adding more lube between Spencer was only thinking about the lips on his own. The pleasure that Aaron's body was giving him.

Spencer only knew that what was pressing inside of him was Aaron's cock before he felt Aaron's hand pressing into the bed at his shoulders. Spencer's body had never been so aroused as it was at that moment. He had never felt so loved, so cherished. Aaron was gentle, but not like he was afraid of breaking Spencer. It was more that he wanted to make it the best for Spencer, which Spencer was glad about.

Aaron broke their kiss to drop his head to Spencer's neck as he thrust steadily inside of Spencer. They were both covered in a sheen of sweat, and Spencer was having trouble keeping hold of Aaron's back to keep his partner right where he wanted him. Spencer trailed his hand down Aaron's back, following his spine before grabbing his ass and pulling him in that little bit harder before Spencer came. He shuddered through the feel of Aaron fucking him through it and slumped down to the bed when it was over. He let his hand slip from Aaron's back and used the other to grab Aaron's head and bring him back up for a kiss.

Aaron's breathing was changing as he was chasing his orgasm, and it sounded nothing like it usually did. Spencer knew well what he sounded like when he was close. Spencer had heard every noise that Aaron made during sex at this point. Spencer let go of Aaron's hair and cupped the side of his cheek, making Aaron push out of the kiss. Aaron's hips stilled, and he all but slumped down into Spencer, his head slipping from Spencer's hand.

"Hey," Spencer said, jostling his shoulder a little so that Aaron's head bounced. "What's wrong?"

"I can't," Aaron said. He tried to move to leave, so Spencer wrapped his arms around Aaron tightly. Aaron gave up after a few seconds, which Spencer was grateful because he was pretty sure that he knew what people talked about when talking about grabbing a greased pig.

"Aaron?" Spencer moved, feeling Aaron a dead weight on top of him. He moved them to where Aaron was on his side, and Spencer was facing him. Spencer brushed at the fringe of hair on Aaron's forehead that had escaped his gel over the course of the day and their round of sex. "What can't you?"

Aaron shook his head and pulled back from Spencer a little.

"Okay, I'm going to go and clean myself up, and I'll come back and clean you up next. Then we can talk or not." Spencer slipped off the bed, looking back at Aaron before he entered the en suite bathroom. The counter had been one of the deciding factors on the house as the counter was at the perfect height for them to have sex on it, of the frottage or masturbation kind.

Spencer turned on the faucet and let it warm up as he grabbed two rags and a hand towel. He used the cold water to wash off his body, making sure that he got everything that was smeared on his belly. He took care with his backside as well before tossing the rag into the towel hamper. He didn't dry himself but instead grabbed his sleep clothes from where Aaron had tossed them sort of toward the hamper outside of the bathroom. He put on his pants and used the shirt to dry off a little. He dropped it into the hamper as he entered the bedroom again and found Aaron lying on his back on the bed. The condom was gone from his cock, and it was soft. Spencer kept his thoughts from overtaking his brain about how he had done something wrong.

Cleaning up Aaron without even thinking about it, Spencer tried to play the sex through his head. He got lost in his head, but he was sure that he had made his like of it known. Spencer jumped a little when his hand was grabbed after he started to dry off Aaron. Spencer looked up at Aaron's face. Spencer pasted on a smile, but Aaron didn't return it. Spencer used his other hand to throw the rag and the hand towel away. Aaron was mostly dry, and what was left, he would air dry or would be dry as soon as the sheets got onto his body.

"I think I was trying too hard," Aaron said.

"How so?" Spencer asked. He cocked his head to the side, he didn't understand Aaron's words at all. How was Aaron trying too hard? What did that have to do with the fact that Aaron had not been able to orgasm? He thought and tried to figure it out, but there was nothing.

"I was too focused on you, and I got too sensitive to where everything felt wrong. I was getting soft long before I stopped."

Spencer could understand that. He had it happen before when he was the one who was giving instead of receiving. Spencer twisted his hand free of Aaron's hand and grabbed the blankets, he snuggled into Aaron's side, laying his head on Aaron's shoulder and wrapping his arm around his waist. The blanket took only a few minutes to warm up, and Spencer used those minutes to get his mind figured out. They were quite a pair.

"One time of sex where I freak out a little or I don't get off isn't going to stop me from letting you have it," Spencer said.

Aaron's hand wiggled under Spencer's body, and he lifted up to allow him to do it more naturally. Aaron wrapped that arm up and around Spencer's back. It felt good, the closeness.

"I know. I just...I wanted it to be perfect. I had this image in my head. I focused on you too much, and I think I stopped myself from orgasm, and it just kind of crashed it."

"This is for you," Spencer said. He rolled a little to where he propped his head on his hand while that was on Aaron's chest to where he could look at him. Aaron tipped his head down on the pillow to where he could look as well. "Don't get me wrong, it felt good to me, but I don't care too much what method is used to get me to orgasm. I would have been happy with you getting off, and then you use your hand on my cock. Or just frottage. Orgasm is an orgasm for me." 

"I know." Aaron lifted his head to slam it back down onto the pillow in frustration. Spencer could understand that. Spencer was pretty straightforward with all of that, but Spencer had to wonder what kind of sex life Aaron and Haley had before they had divorced. Aaron's wants of Spencer's pleasure over his own was kind of worrying, considering that most of the time, Spencer really didn't care if he got off. He really didn't, but Aaron cared, so Spencer tried to care more. "I think that I learned a few nasty habits."

"Not bad, just different. We just gotta learn a little more about each other, I think." Spencer shifted to where he was holding himself above Aaron. He ducked his head down and kissed him. It was just a simple brush of lips. "I love you."

"Love you too. Talk to me? Talk me into sleep?" Aaron asked. 

"Always. What do you want to hear tonight?"

"That King Arthur story you were reading to Jack, but I wanna hear it in French. I don't remember all of it that I learned, but I just want to hear your voice." 

"Okay." Spencer settled back down like they had been, Aaron's arm around his waist to hold him close and Spencer's across the chest. Spencer reached over and took a sip of the bottle of water on the bedside before he settled fully down to start to tell Aaron a story.

* * *

Spencer didn't open his eyes. He knew it was still early morning as the sun had not yet gotten into his face, but he could feel some of the rays on it. He smiled as he felt that he and Aaron were still in the same position that they had been in. Aaron's arm was probably asleep wrapped around him, but Spencer knew that Aaron wouldn't care. 

Having to move, Spencer shuffled his leg into a new postilion and stopped as he drew it up a little further than he meant to. Aaron's cock was hard. Spencer trailed his hand down Aaron's chest and wrapped it around his cock. It was very hard, just from being in bed with Spencer. Spencer turned his head to kiss Aaron's chest before he moved slowly. Aaron was mostly asleep, but Spencer wouldn't try and do anything until he was fully awake. That didn't mean that he couldn't tease. Spencer kissed down his chest before licking at the head of Aaron's cock. He stayed under the blankets because he liked that part, Aaron throwing them back to look at him. Spencer had enjoyed learning how to please Aaron this way. He was good at giving Aaron pleasure, even if oral sex was rare between them. It was mostly rubbing and handjobs, but on occasion, Spencer liked to do this for Aaron. 

"Yes," Aaron whispered as he fisted the sheets with one hand and pulled the blankets off of them with the other. 

Spencer looked up at him as he was revealed, giving Aaron a big grin before he licked up the underside of Aaron's cock before taking the head into his mouth. Spencer could do this. The act was personal, intimate, something that most who were like them didn't just allow anyone to do. So it was more of an act between lovers than strangers. Spencer liked having control over Aaron, the ability to break him apart, but not have to actually do anything on his part to show that he liked it. He didn't have to keep an erection, he didn't have to do anything but give Aaron head. 

Aaron spread his legs, planting his feet on the bed after raising up his knees. He didn't thrust up into Spencer's mouth but just stayed there like that, giving Spencer access to his balls. Spencer changed his angle a little bit and went down on Aaron a little more with each pass. Spencer knew from his education from college and just talking to other people that there were some who got off on this act alone, that the act of sucking a cock made them hard and so mentally aroused that they could come untouched. Spencer didn't feel that. He only felt arousal when he was with Aaron if there was a lot of stimulation, or Aaron was worked up a lot. Aaron lost in pleasure, would normally arouse Spencer. 

Spencer felt Aaron's hand in his hair, which meant that he was close. Spencer reached down to play with his balls, feeling them start to draw up into his body. Spencer moved his thumb back to press right on Aaron's perineum, and he prepared himself for Aaron's orgasm. Aaron did not disappoint. Spencer was barely done swallowing and licking Aaron's cock clean when Aaron pulled him up to him by his hair. The roughness of it was something that had been startling to Spencer the first time that Aaron had done it. Aaron had never been that rough with him before, but Aaron had rolled them, kissing Spencer hard and returning the favor of getting Spencer off with just his body. Spencer wasn't shocked by it anymore. Usually, it meant that Aaron was too worked up to care about finesse. It was pleasing to Spencer to be able to make Aaron have that reaction. 

"Good morning," Aaron said before he let go of Spencer's hair and leaned up for a kiss. Spencer hated that part, but then Aaron loved the taste of himself in Spencer's mouth, so Spencer wasn't going to deny him. Spencer gave into the kiss with as much aplomb as he could muster. He braced himself up on his arms and jerked away from Aaron's wandering hand when it came near his cock. Aaron changed the course of the hand and wrapped it around Spencer's hip to hold him in place so they could keep on kissing. Aaron was good at reading what Spencer wanted or didn't want when he did things like that. He was the first lover that Spencer had that did not take it personally as hell for him to not want the favor returned as it were.

"Morning," Spencer said when they finally separated. He looked down at Aaron and gave him a smile. 

"I love morning wake-ups like that," Aaron said. He used his hold on Spencer's hip to tip him up a little to where he was sitting on Aaron's stomach. Spencer smiled down at him. 

"I know that you do. You like waking up with me in bed with no matter what I am doing to you. So, what are we doing for breakfast? You told Jack that we would do breakfast out since we didn't get as many dinners with him."

"I did, didn't I? Well, how about we shower. I want to thank you for your kindness this morning and last night by washing you, and then we can see if Jack's awake. If he is, we will make you a cup of coffee to go, and if he's not, we will make a pot of coffee that we will drink while reading the newspapers." Aaron started to sit up, pushing Spencer back to where he was sitting in Aaron's lap when Aaron was done moving. He wrapped his arms around Spencer tightly before he nuzzled in at his neck.

"That sounds like a good idea." Spencer wiggled his arms free and wrapped them around Aaron's neck. 

The sound of Jack's feet coming down the hall had Spencer grabbing the blanket quickly and wrapping it around them as the door opened, and Jack entered. They forgot to lock the door. Jack knew to knock when the door was locked, but he was allowed in if it was unlocked. Maybe it was time to change that to shut at all, and he needed to knock. 

"I'm hungry, and I've been patient and waiting until you two got up. Can we go to eat, please?" Jack asked. 

Spencer buried his face in the side of Aaron's face, keeping his laughter to himself. He felt Aaron shaking with it as well, and it nearly made Spencer lose it. 

"Give us time to shower, and then we can go. Make Spencer a cup of coffee in the Keurig, and we might get out of here quicker." 

"Okay." Jack shut the door and was gone in just a few seconds. Spencer heard him thumping as he went down the stairs. 

"Aaron, your six-year-old son should not be making me coffee."

"He makes me some in the mornings. He knows not to stick his fingers in the hole, and he knows how to operate it. He'll probably even put in just enough sugar and creamer to the cup before brewing into it. He has learned that it stirs up better that way. Let's get showered and get dressed, and then we can leave."

"Is everything okay after last night?" Spencer asked. He wanted to talk at least a little bit about it. They had the time and could finish it in the shower. 

"Yes. I'll get mine before you get yours next time," Aaron said with a shit-eating grin on his face. 

Spencer could read the sincerity in his eyes, though. Aaron was going to try and do better at not stopping himself from getting what he wanted. Spencer wasn't going to freak if he didn't get off, and Spencer knew that it was just going to take time for Aaron to trust in that. In the warm light of morning, Spencer knew Aaron was a lot more damaged from his relationship than Spencer thought he was, more than he was sure Aaron thought he was. Spencer didn't care; everyone was broken in their own ways, but being broken didn't mean that someone was wrong. There were many people who saw Spencer as broken and it had taken Spencer a long time to look past what they saw and know that they were wrong and he wasn't broken. 

"Hey," Aaron said as he pulled Spencer back when Spencer tried to get off his lap. "I won't say I'm sorry other than I know that you had to think you did something wrong, and you didn't. It's me and my head. I just need time. I think I'm doing pretty well at learning you. Learning what you like, what you don't. What I like that's more sensual instead of sexual. I find that I like the way that we are. You are open when you are okay with sex, and you don't play games. I really like that."

"There is no sense in playing games like that in a relationship of any kind. There really isn't. We are who we are, and there is no shame in anything if you like it, and it doesn't hurt you or other people. Well, outside of the pain that people like during sex. I can see the aspect of more and more."

"Yeah?" Aaron asked with a quirked eyebrow. 

"I like it when you are rougher with me post-orgasm than you are pre-orgasm. I like that a lot. I never thought that I would, but I do."

"Well, as always, if I do something you don't like..." Aaron trailed off. 

"I will tell you, don't worry." Spencer leaned in and brushed his lips over Aaron's. Aaron pulled him in a little closer and turned the kiss into something a little more. It felt good, it felt right. It was a promise and a whole lot more wrapped up in a kiss.

# The End

**Author's Note:**

> I write fanfiction for fun. It's a hobby and a stress relief. I refuse to stress over my writing. What you see is what you get. Errors, plot holes, and all. Thank you for reading my story! 
> 
> I can be found on MeWe [here](https://mewe.com/i/beccaqueen1), join me there and we can discuss my fics and whatnot. 


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